It is incredible the things the passage of time can wash away. The sharp hurt of the loss of a loved one ever so slowly with time hopefully will turn into found memories of the time you had with them. Even water given enough time will carve great valleys, caves, and canyons out of stone. When I started this blog back in September 03, 2005
I was thinking that Norah had already been born and that it was only going to be a six month wait for us after our dossier was in China to travel and to become a family of four. I was right on somethings Norah had already been born and was living in China, but I was so wrong on the time it was going to take us to meet one another.
I am greatful to have started this blog. I can now look back over the years and see my thoughts and feelings at diffrent times in this adoption. Like the one from Saturday, February 18, 2006 that is the same security blanket that we sent Norah in her first care package.
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"From the time we first decided to adopt Norah we have been picking up things for her when we are out. This helps us make a connection with her. One of the first things I bought for her was this security blanket. It wasn’t expensive but it means so much to me when I see it, I know that it is her security blanket."
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Or this one from the time I met the man who was using Sign Language while speaking to a group at the Clinton Library.
Little did I know at the time that Norah coming into our lives was going to give me the gift of Sign Language.
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"Lori and I went to the President Clinton library in Little Rock, Arkansas for his (Clintons) birthday for two reasons: it was free admission to the library on his birthday, and we have never been. So what the heck, when we got there much to our surprise they were giving away free cake and a watermelon to boot. We toured the library and looked at all the things that went on during his presidency. One of the most amazing things I saw that day was not the replica of the oval office. It was this guy; I don’t remember his name but I was very impressed with him so I had to get a photo with him to remember him by. We went into a round room to watch a short movie and he came in and started speaking and using sign language at the same time because there was a deaf couple in the theater. I sat in awe as he signed away telling us about the library and why Clinton picked that spot for it. He was very nice to talk with after the movie had ended and was happy to let Lori take our photo. I may try to get his name so I can write the library and tell them how nice he was to us and what an asset to the library he truly is.Glen "
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So now let me get back to the purpose of this post. I was going threw our adoption file getting rid of some of the papers from the last three and a half years that we now longer need. When I came across the welcome letter I received from Joshua Z. the Co-founder & president of our adoption agency dated Novermember 7th, 2005. What an exciting time that was, paper chasing, and frustrating to have to deal with some U.S. agencies to get our paper work back. I started to see changes in the China adoption program about the same time we got done paper chasing in 7-22-06, and over the next three years we had good days and bad dealing with not knowing who my daughter was and how she was doing. Having to run into people that we had told about the adoption one year, two years then three years ago and tell them "maybe six to ten more months". One of the most painful times was when I ran into a guy I worked with over the years and he asked me have your gotten home with your daughter yet, when I responded with not yet we hope to hear something in the next six months or so. His reply was “Glen you told me that two years ago.”
Now I believe everything happens for a reason, even the things that are hard on you. Along with the pain, the long wait has brought some wonderful gifts to my family like Annie. She is such a wonderful person to have in our lives. We would not have met her if it were not for the long wait. Even Norah, the things that had to happen to bring this wonderful child into our lives took place over the last three years.
I have heard people say once you see your childs face all the pain of the wait will wash away. I wish that was true for me but it was such a painful time in my life, I don’t think I will ever forget it. The wait was something that I had to survive to get to Norah, and Norah had to survive it to get to us too…..
Glen
3 comments:
Hi Glen, actually, between referral and the time you travel IS the hardest. Before referral, you have a dream and an idea of who she is....after referral, you have a face. You have a person. I understand your pain.
The part about seeing your child's face, for me, was when we actually GOT her. Really, you are probably in your worst slump right now because you know who she is but you can't comfort her.
What you're going thru is normal. Soon you will have her though, and there will be so much to do!!
We did and re-did paperwork, and it was three years between the time we started the process and ,when we got Reese.Yes, a lot of days i wondered if we ever would go.Now that we have Reese...she was SO worth the wait!Norah will be too!
Actually I am thrilled right now we have a daughter, and we are working towards getting to her, it is a wonderful time and I am still confident that we will be in China in late march early April. If I gave the impression I was in a funk I didn’t mean to I am one happy DAD!
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